During biblical times, modesty was expected of women with respect to their conduct and attire at church gatherings and in fellowship (1 Timothy 2: 9-10). It wasn’t that braided hair and gold jewelry were necessarily bad, but flashy attire was discouraged because of the attention it garnered. Also, it was presumed that if someone was “wearing” their financial status, they weren’t giving enough of it back to the church or poor.

I don’t think the Lord’s position on this subject has changed all that much over time. I think he expects us to dress for the occasion, be modest, and exercise self-control when it comes to how we carry and present ourselves to the world.

I’ll be the first to admit, I love fashion—especially nice clothes and handbags. I wear designer labels, but designer labels do not make up my entire wardrobe, nor am I defined by them. There have been seasons in my life where the Lord has convicted me of excess when it comes to my wardrobe–I repented and made efforts to scale back. Recently, I wrote about a handbag purchase that didn’t have His seal of approval. Consequently, I didn’t enjoy it and ended up gifting it to a friend. Years ago, the Lord suggested I auction off a bunch of my purses for one of my favorite charities, and I raised a lot of money for it. I like to dress nice for church (while not required, I think the Lord likes it when we groom ourselves respectably for fellowship), but I am careful about what I wear, when I wear it, why I wear it, and who I wear it around.

Dressing relatively conservative has always come natural to me. Spending weekends with my Paskistani (Muslim) family reinforced modest ways of dress for women. Showing a lot of skin never felt comfortable.

I try not to mince words, so I’m just going to say this. What we allow our children to wear (especially our teenage daughters) is often inappropriate and sexually suggestive. Dresses that hit above mid-thigh, shorts that show bottoms, gaping neck lines on shirts—none of it is glorifying to God. Friends, it sends the wrong message to our girls. It tells them that it’s okay to be objectified. I know, it’s peer pressure (the world). It’s what all the stores sell. It’s not worth the hormonally charged argument every morning before school. I totally get it. I pick my battles with my daughter, and she’s only five. But this is a battle you’ll want to invest Jesus’ resources in, one that is worth fighting. The consequences of taking a passive approach to it may be dire to your daughter down the road.

Moms, I get that it’s hard to fight that battle against aging. Now, in my late forties (and resisting the urge to try anti-aging “enhancements”…subject for another article), I fight it myself. If you’re of a certain age, in good physical shape, and proud of your body, I get that you want to show it off to some extent. But the Lord doesn’t want us flaunting our stuff in front of others, especially other (married) men who easily fall prey to the enemy’s wiles of temptation. I think you can dress in a way that flatters your figure, makes you feel good about yourself, and glorifies the Lord. All you have to do is ask Him to show you (in prayer).

Women who dress scantily clad usually do so out of insecurity and seek their worth from the approval of others. Children who dress this way usually don’t know better. It’s simply a societal norm that they are following. As parents, it’s on us to help them know His truth and teach them to respect their bodies and their maker.

The Lord wants you to know that your worth is not in how much bling your wear on your body. Your worth is in Him alone. He doesn’t want you to stop taking care of yourself or not care about your physical exterior. He wants you to be clothed in Christ–with all the fruits of the Holy Spirit. He wants to show you the real beauty of “less is more” and how inner beauty can truly reflect on the outside when you seek His will for your life and dress for spiritual success.

“Father God, thank you for your wisdom. Help us to adorn our bodies in ways that are glorifying to you. Help us control our fleshy desires when they run counter to your ways. Most importantly, help us to feel beautiful from the many ways that Jesus radiates in our lives.”